Face: A LIFE WELL LIVED
Body: LEAN CUISINE
Arms: PARTS UNKNOWN
Distinguishing features: EXCELLENT IN THE KITCHEN
Attainability: NO RESERVATIONS
Liberally peppering one’s vernacular with obscenities is something that flows fairly effortlessly for me, given that I grew up in Essex and am half Australian, half Scouser. Bourdain, too, is a tad handy with the execrations, being from New York and all; but this merely serves to heighten the ideological bond that I feel he and I share. Effing and blinding your way through life is an extraordinarily satisfactory way to live. Try it, you might like it! When coupled with the type of lean, rangy, elegant frame that would look excellent in a well-tailored suit (if he could ever be arsed to wear one), his predilection for profanities renders him deliciously paradoxical. He is an astute social commentator, and his willingness to just-get-stuck-in (wherever he happens to be) bodes well when it comes to his willingness in other areas, if you catch my drift. Of course you do. Reader, never underestimate the allure of a man who will try anything at least once. Oh, and he’s six foot four.
(For more ladies than I know where to start with. Kerry, you’re one of ’em. Xx)