JUSTIN TRUDEAU

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Face: LUKE WILSON ON WALL STREET
Body: YOGA RETREAT
Arms: RELATABLE
Personality: TRU-DAT
Distinguishing features: BEING INCRED
Attainability: HAPPILY MARRIED WITH KIDS

As much as I deeply enjoy coming from a country with a privately-educated Prime Minister who essentially hates the poor, the disabled, the elderly, all women, the disadvantaged and everybody with a mental illness; who resembles a pair of three denier tights filled with red marzipan; who favours a willing oral cavity of the porcine variety, and who is hellbent on dismantling one of the greatest global health institutions for the monetary gain of his equally repugnant counterparts – as much as I DEEPLY enjoy all of those things – the alternative of having a Prime Minister who is resolutely pro-choice with regards to abortion, is a proud feminist completely committed to gender equality (starting with his own ethnically diverse parliamentary cabinet), is already tackling the tax discrepancies between high and low earners, and is married to a women’s rights campaigner seems mildly preferable . . .  I don’t know about you.

(For Katie P, and about 4 billion other women. Xxx)

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