Monthly Archives: April 2014

DAVE GAHAN

Face: SICILIAN MOBSTER Body: AGING HIPSTER Arms: ULTRA Personality: ENJOY THE SILENCE Distinguishing Features: BRILLIANT BARITONE Attainability: MARRIED WITH KIDS Obviously he loves a bit of the old drugs, everybody knows that. He’s clean now, but for years he was … Continue reading

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DAVE GROHL

Face: FOOF BITER (sorry) Body: SKIN AND BONES Arms: NEVERMIND Personality: ULTRADUDE Distinguishing Features: MUSICAL POLYMATH Attainability: MAZZAD It is commonly agreed amongst the rock contingency that Mr Grohl is the nicest guy in rock music. There are many, many … Continue reading

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STEWART LEE

Face: PUDGY Body: COMEDY VEHICLE Arms: FIST(S) OF FUN Personality: DRIER THAN NEFERTITI’S VAGINA Distinguishing Features: HUMANIST Attainability: MARRIED, I BELIEVE You just would, wouldn’t you. For a start, he’s fucking funny. Secondly, he’s one hell of a clever bastard. … Continue reading

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TODD TERJE

Face: CHERUB DRESSED UP AS A CARTOON FISHERMAN Body: TALL DRINK O’ WATER Arms: SWING STAR(S) Personality: LOVELY Distinguishing Features: CREATIVE POWERHOUSE Attainability: BABETRON DELUXE GIRLFRIEND Do you like music? If not, why not? Music is the BEST. And if … Continue reading

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