Monthly Archives: July 2013

JOHANNES HUEBL

Face: YALE CIRCA ’88 Body: HANOVER REMEDY Arms: VORSPRUNG DURCH TECHNIK Personality: DULL? Distinguishing Features: SKIN LIKE PATRICK BATEMAN Attainability: NOPE Oh man. You know how I have this thing for men that are, like, too perfect looking? I mean, … Continue reading

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ORLANDO WEEKS

Face: POSH YOOT INNIT Body: FASH PACK APPROVED Arms: FEEL TO FOLLOW Personality: SEEMS SOUND Distinguishing Features: VOICE Attainability: DUNNO I can’t even fucking name a single track by The Maccabees, but because I am both incredibly shallow and also … Continue reading

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REECE SHEARSMITH

Face: MALLEABLE Body: SLIGHT Arms: GENTLEMANLY Personality: SPLIT Distinguishing Features: CHAMELEON Attainability: MARRIED WITH SPROGS The fact I am about to reveal to you is indicative of exactly how fucking twisted my brain is: I fancied Reece Shearsmith the most … Continue reading

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MATTHEW MOSSHART

I’m really sorry that this is the first post in a fortnight — I’ve been moving house and decorating! My new place is super-mega. Anyway, here’s a topical post… Face: LOVELY BONES Body: TEEN MODEL Arms: SLIPPY Personality: UNCONDITIONALLY LOVELY … Continue reading

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JULIAN BARRETT

Face: THE MIGHTY OOOSH Body: LEEDS BRICKIE Arms: PLEASINGLY REGULAR Personality: INTROVERT Distinguishing Features: UNDERSTATED WIT Attainability: SHACKED UP WITH ULTRABABE JULIA DAVIS It was his role as the exasperated non-hipster Dan Ashcroft in Nathan Barley that made me love … Continue reading

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