JUSTIN THEROUX

justin-theroux-01-628Face: GOLD PROSPECTOR
Body: NICELY TAUT
Arms: ROCKS OF AGES
Personality: ANTI-AMERICAN PSYCHO
Distinguishing features: SCREENWRITING SKILLZ
Attainability: SHACKED UP WITH ANISTON

He’s Louis Theroux’s cousin. That’s enough, right? It is for me, anyway. But if you want some more reasons, here you go: he’s one of the best things about American Psycho, looking sexy as FUCK in a bespoke Valentino suit and exuding a Wall Street arrogance. He’s building some serious steam as a Hollywood screenwriter, having been responsible for recent hits Tropic Thunder, Iron Man 2, Rock of Ages, and the forthcoming Zoolander 2. He’s a firm favourite of David Lynch, featuring in Mulholland Dr. and Inland Empire, and shining in both. And, last but not least, he’s LOUIS THEROUX’S COUSIN. Oh, and he’s Paul Theroux’s nephew, so he’s probably got access to some puh-retty sweet bookshelves. 2012 has been a great year for Justin (he settled down with top lass Jennifer Aniston), and I hope it has been for you too. See you in 2013, pervs!

 

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