Body: ROAD TO PERV-DITION
Arms: STUNT CAPABLE
Personality: dunderderdundundunDERRR NERRR! DER NER NER
Distinguishing features: THOSE EYES
Attainability: MARRIED TO SEXBOMB RACHEL WEISZ. SO, NO.
Weeeeeeeell… It’s topical, innit? I’ve ummed and aahed about Daniel Craig featuring on WOULD for a while. It’s because in between watching him in films, I forget how sexy he is. Pictures don’t really do him justice, and sometimes he even looks a bit craggy-creepy. But then on screen… WHAM! He is so, so, so fucking charismatic. Having to look him directly in the eyes would be a bit like going on a trip down Laser Quest just after they’d serviced the ray guns — almost too intense. His uncontrollable masculinity, combined with his well-defined muscular frame (surely he was born to wear bespoke Tom Ford tailoring? Phwoooaaaaar!) lends him an almost unnervingly high level of manliness. I feel like I’d just end up being a massive dick around him because I wouldn’t know what the fuck else to do. Anyway — go and see Skyfall; it’s fantastic.