RUSSELL TOVEY

Face: FIT TOBY JUG
Body: NAVVY
Arms: BUFF TINGS
Personality: TOP
Distinguishing features: BLOODY ACE CONVO
Attainability: SINGLE?

What’s not to love about a hench, funny, talented, intelligent, Essex boy? NUTTIN’. Sounds pretty perfect to me. Brilliant in everything he acts in, Tovey has proven that his aptitude for comedy is as sterling as his skill in dramatic roles. I hope we see him in loads more stuff next year. Self-aware, clever and sharp, Tovey no doubt makes a champion writer as well as an actor, and his self-penned film will hopefully be funded soon and we’ll get to see more of this lad’s talents. Sadly pour moi, my vagina prevents a dalliance with Russell ever taking place, so I’ll have to make do with a lad who I see in a bar who bears more than a passing resemblance to this fine chap. Meanwhile, you lads should snap him up while you can. Jellz.

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