JARED LETO

Face: JON-BENET
Body: CHANGEABLE
Arms: AS ABOVE
Personality: SELF-DEPRECATING
Distinguishing features: BABY BLUES
Attainability: TOO NOMADIC

Jared, Jared, Jared… You don’t know this, but in your early incarnation as Jordan Catalano (in the seminal My So-Called Life) you awoke a certain longing deep inside us. Those densely fringed cornflower coloured eyes and delicately boned face are, bizarrely, not to everyone’s taste – you being a total pretty boy an’ all, but even thought you currently sport some very, very snide hair and sing in a spectacularly shit band (beloved of American emo teenagers), your legacy remains. I like to remember you as Paul Allen in American Psycho – your slick, arrogant, Oliver Peoples bespectacled portrayal of a yuppie was hot as fuck.

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