Face: MOUNT RUSHMORE
Distinguishing features: DUDE
Attainability: SHIT (MARRIED FOR ABOUT 80 YEARS)
There’s no finer slice of Hollywood royalty than El Duderino himself. This laid back stoner is now a silver fox (still absolutely would), but as you can see he was once an all-American hunk with a leonine mane of tawny hair. His sex appeal lies in his lack of self-consciousness, as well as his huuuuuuuuuge talent and sense of humour. Well known is the fact that he’s the nicest guy in cinema, but a lesser known fact is that he happens to be a goddam sexy motherfucker. I’d love to sit on a rocking chair on a porch with a big patchwork quilt and a margarita, while Jeff just talks and talks as the sun goes down. Yeah, OK, I’ll go in the hot tub with him too, I SUPPOSE.