MARK WAHLBERG

Face: DOUGHY
Body: MINT
Arms: SLAMMIN’
Personality: GOOD VIBRATIONS
Distinguishing Features: MASTER OF REINVENTION
Attainability: MARRIED TO A SUPERMODEL

Well, if you spent your teenage years in the 1990s reading Smash Hits and furtively moving on to ‘grown-up’ shizzle like The Face and SKY and Vogue, you’ll remember the mega Calvin Klein ads with a young Marky Mark (minus the Funky Bunch – who, by the way, made several catastrophic sartorial errors, as well as sounding like the cast of a kids cartoon about grapes) and a barely pubescent yet luminous Kate Moss. Totally hot. His body was rrrrrrrrrripped. With Boogie Nights furthering his attractiveness (basically, everyone thinks he has a massive schlong and this has never been disproven), Mark moved into proper actor-dom. Now a huge player on the Hollywood scene as an actor and a producer, he seems to make more and more interesting choices, career-wise. Also, he’s from Boston. Go for it, dude. You’re like, 237867856756 times cooler than your big brother Donny.

(Oh Lisaaaaaa! This is for yoooooooou! xx)

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One Response to MARK WAHLBERG

  1. Vivienne Berryman says:

    He has a sense of humour too, as well as being rrrrrrrrrrriped. So, yeah, why not?

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