BLAIR UNDERWOOD

Face: PORE-LESS
Body: PEERLESS
Arms: HUNKO
Personality: LA LAW ABIDING
Distinguishing Features: PERFECT TEETH
Attainability: MARRIED WITH SPAWN

You know how some people are sort of too perfect looking on camera? Underwood’s got that vibe. That’s why he was brilliantly cast as Miranda’s super-amazing doctor lover who sent Steve into a jealous frenzy on Sex And The City. His teeth are like dozens of white Parisian metro tiles, so symmetrically formed and expensively veneered. I bet he smells like clean laundry and sexual cologne. Forgive the cunty choker necklace in the above picture, for these are normally reserved for desperate losers in the sartorial game like Richard Hammond, or anyone that goes on a gap year. I suspect that Blair’s stylist got a bit heavy-handed with the early noughties ethnic trinkets after watching The Beach.

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One Response to BLAIR UNDERWOOD

  1. Vivienne says:

    Smooth. Serious. Sultry. Sexy. Sassy. Sausages.

    Oh ok, forgive the ‘sausages’ but I couldn’t think of another cool word beginning with S to describe this cool fella.

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